Dear Destiny Friends,

Life’s trials will test you, and shape you, but don’t let them change who you are” –  Aaron Lauritsen 

There’s no doubt life can be extremely challenging, and these challenges can come in the form of financial instability, desire for a child, unemployment, accommodation, health, and even personal and professional issues. All these are capable of making one give up as it’s not easy to push through when life pushes one around.

It is a known fact that everyone experiences one form of secret frustration or another; the differentiating factor is how each manages his own. How we manage these challenges speak a lot about our maturity, understanding, and attitude to life. While some people vent it out, others smile through it knowing fully well they can’t change the situation.

It is worthy of note that everyone needs inspiration to forge ahead. It can be internal or external inspiration; when the inspiration is external, it can limit our impacts because we are depending on external force to forge ahead, but when it is internal, the force is unlimited because one don’t literally need other people to forge ahead. Don’t get me wrong, external inspiration is great, but what happens if the external inspiration is no longer available? That’s why the best form of inspiration we need is internal and personal inspiration.

When you have internal inspiration, giving up in life is not an option no matter the challenge encountered along the way.

It’s generally easy for one to give up when life is not adding up. Imagine having a passion without corresponding support; imagine business without patronage; imagine having a vision without support to actualize it. It can be traumatizing.

However, I have good news for you; giving up is not an option, no matter how nasty and distasteful things might appear. When you are passionate about a cause, or have a vision about something, your patience will be tested. It’s your persistence to preserve that will determine how passionate you are about the cause.

Most great people who invented great products didn’t have fun doing it. They had their own challenges and experience, so why do you think life will be relatively easy for you?

It’s instructive to note that nothing comes easy. One will have to continually explore options to make one’s idea come to fruition. These ideas can be learning from resourceful people, paying to learn a trade, exploring mentors both online and in -person, using social media to network strategically, producing contents either with video or writings to showcase to the world what you do and where you need assistance. You might occasionally get direct and constructive criticisms, don’t take it personally, just learn from it.

According to Uche Okorie, a maritime lawyer, “When you are criticized objectively, examine it. If it is untrue, ignore it. If it is unfair, resist the temptation to be irritated. If it is ignorant, just smile. If it is justified, then it is NOT criticism, LEARN FROM IT!”

One may be experiencing pain which can vary from different factors, but if you believe in yourself, believe in your product, believe in your passion and vision, it will add up. One day, the right person(s) will locate you or somebody might even recommend you. Nobody literally had it easy. According to Roy T. Bennett, “If you don’t give up on something you truly believe in, you will find a way.”

The fact that you may have failed in your education, business, marriage, career, etc., is not enough reason to give up. As you walk through the journey of life, never give in to failure, until you have made your last attempt and never make your last attempt until you succeed. You just need to see life from the bright side and see the negative part as experience.

According to Roy Bennett, “It doesn’t matter how many times you get knocked down. All that matters is you get up one more time than you were knocked down.” It’s the time you get up that counts for your determination.

Furthermore, Andy Warhol stated “It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.” So, you are encouraged to push through your mistakes.

It’s just like an accomplished public speaker. Before you can connect with people, you must have stories and experiences which your audience can relate to. Imagine speaking without any personal or practical information, it will be hard for your audience to connect. Do you see why challenges and experiences help people to attract value? In most cases, it’s the experience people pay for when they engage you. Aaron Lauritsen informed that “without struggle, success has no value”. So, it’s your pains, setbacks, mistakes, and trials that give you value which makes you relevant and valuable.

On a personal note, I have failed more than I have succeeded. I have lost count of my mistakes and numerous opportunities I missed due to not knowing better. I have been mocked and insulted numerous times for being a horrible writer, I have been jobless, I have had accommodation problem, I have had marital challenges, I have experienced financial instability, l have felt like giving up, the list is literally endless, but giving up was never an option for me because my inspiration is internal.

Just to encourage you; your desire for success should always outweigh your fear of failure. No matter what you may have experienced or is experiencing, please use this writer as your case study and never to give up. Just imagine graduating from New York Law School and working as a security officer with your colleagues seeing you. Imagine being mocked by fellow security officers who barely had a high school diploma saying, how come you went to Law school and still work as a security officer?

Now imagine the fellow who was mocked for being a horrible writer now the author of two trailblazer books; imagine the security officer being interviewed by New York Times and profiled by News12 several times on topical issues; imagine the security guard being recognized by United Nations Development Programme as a partner for Youths Development. The list can go on and on. If I was told I will get this far, I may not have believed it, but one thing is certain, I always have a feeling, I will make it big, but I don’t know how it will happen, neither did I know when, where and how it will happen.

So, this is me telling you, your test will lead to your testimony, your pain will lead to your pleasure and your disappointment will lead to your appointment if you don’t give up. Note, I’m not where I want to be yet, I’m still pushing despite challenges.

I can go on and on, but I’m just sharing this piece to let you know nobody had it easy. What made it easy for me was the influence of mentors and a strong support system, but more importantly, I believe in myself, and I know this too shall pass. I believed in the words of Aaron Lauristsen, which states “There is a strange comfort in knowing that no matter what happens today, the Sun will rise again tomorrow.” I don’t know what your storyline will be, I’m just here to encourage you to stay strong.

In conclusion, I will like to leave you with the words of Roy Bennett ‘Your hardest times often lead to the greatest moments of your life. Keep going. Tough situations build strong people in the end.”

Remember, tough times never last, but tough people do. If you keep hope alive, I see you celebrating in the nearest future.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny.  He can be reached via

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